Going Into College With a Boyfriend

It’s a typical question for couples going into college. Do we stay together? Do we break up? Are we supposed to be single in college? The answer varies for everyone. As someone who decided to stay with their high school sweetheart in college, I believe there are a few questions you should ask yourself before deciding to call it quits.

Are you happy?

Are you happy in your relationship? If yes, evaluate why you would want to break up. Would being single make you happier than your relationship would? If not, then why not give it a shot? Worse comes to worse, you try it out for a month or two and break up a few months into college.

Does your relationship have trust?

If you trust your significant other and they trust you, you may have a solid foundation for a long distance relationship. An important part of going into college with a boyfriend or girlfriend is allowing each other to experience college and find themselves. I’ve had a boyfriend all through college and have been able to go out with the girls every weekend, and even study abroad for 5 months. My boyfriend and I live separate lives as we learn about ourselves and gain our own experiences, but at the end of the day we know we have the support of each other.

Do you see things going long term?

If you don’t see your relationship lasting the test of time, it doesn’t make much sense to go into college with a long distance relationship. Long distance relationships require commitment, and they will only work if you are both in it for the long haul. If you don’t think you want this to continue in the future, the summer before college is the perfect time to end things.

This being said, everything is different for everyone. Do what’s best for you, but DON’T LET OTHER PEOPLE TELL YOU WHAT’S RIGHT. I was told by many people around me that I should go into college single. Now, I am a semester away from graduation and still with my boyfriend. Staying with him through college is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. I didn’t miss out on meeting new people or having fun in college. Instead I skipped the awkward phase of pursuing freshmen college boys (who mostly all want to be single anyway).

I did have people who doubted my relationship, and was even once called, “disrespectful” for coming to college with a boyfriend by a lacrosse player who was mad I wouldn’t hang out with him. These are the kinds of things you have to brush off, and remember that the only opinions that matter in this decision are you, and your significant other. Staying with my boyfriend in college has allowed for us to see each other grow and mature, and for our relationship to grow with us.

The moral of the story is to do what’s best for you! My number one rule in this situation is to block out the outside opinions, and listen to your heart.

Thanks for reading! Talk soon!

-Jess

A love lock I left for us when studying abroad, overlooking Tower Bridge in London.


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